The Journey Continues – Secrets

Secrets

Why do we feel the need to keep secrets? Are secrets a bad thing? Are they really lies because they withhold truth from others? What are the motivations behind the secrets that are kept by ourselves and others?

To even begin to answer some of these questions, we need to understand what a secret is really defined to be. Let me start in my favorite place, the dictionary: 1. Kept separate or hidden from view or knowledge, or from all persons except the individuals concerned; concealed; hidden. 2. Beyond normal comprehension; obscure; recondite. 3. Known or revealed only to the initiated; mystic; secret rites. 4. Affording privacy; secluded. 5. Unrevealed or unavowed as such, I.e., a secret partner.

Hmmm…it appears there can be reasons to have secrets that hold no “sinister” motives behind them. Is this like everything else in our world of duality, in that it can be used for good reasons or for not-so-good ones? I guess motivation has a lot to do with what kind of secrets we’re keeping or are being kept from us.

Who can deny the joy that can be found in keeping the secret of a surprise party from the recipient of it? Or, how about that special present for a birthday, anniversary, or holiday that someone has always wanted? Doesn’t it bring joy to both the giver and receiver when the secret is kept until that moment of giving? These are small secrets meant to bring joy and pleasure to those involved in the giving and receiving in that moment of its revealing.

There are even times we feel we are doing something positive or for the good of another person when we withhold the truth from them. We mean no harm. In fact, we feel we are preventing some form of harm by keeping certain information secret from one or more persons. Are we really? Speaking only for myself, I would rather know the “truth” than find out later that I had been lied to or at least not told the whole truth. Sometimes, in our efforts to not cause what we consider to be harm to others, we make decisions that really aren’t ours to make concerning the welfare of others by assuming we know how they will react to the information.

I think that’s the part about many secrets that bothers me the most. Someone deciding for me that it would be better to keep something secret because I may not be able to handle the truth. That especially holds true for governments and the secrets they keep from their citizens. They justify the secret-keeping by telling themselves that it would cause panic among the people. You don’t know me or my friends, family, or even my neighbors. How do you know we would panic? To me, this smells of being something else that is far from genuine concern about my/our welfare.

These are the secrets that bother me. They don’t even have to be being kept by governments or companies. Although, to me, these are the worst ones. They could be secrets kept by friends, family members, or. the worst of all to me, your partner/spouse. These are people who you easily place your trust in and they can’t find it within themselves to be honest with you? Seriously?

Trust is one of the tenets of the spiritual path I walk. Without trust, love really has no meaning. Without trust there can be no real respect between people. Trust is built through honesty and integrity. Secrets can ruin that and cause relationships of all kinds to disintegrate. Why would anyone want to cause that to happen?

On a more individual level, I would say fear causes us to keep secrets. Somewhere inside us, we have lost faith in ourselves. We fear speaking our truth will cause recriminations. Oftentimes, the secrets we keep involve who we really are and what we really want for ourselves and our lives. We have learned that to speak the truth of who we truly are can cause rejection and disapproval. So, we keep our secrets, telling no one or a few very trusted people.

On a societal, cultural, governmental levels, the excuses used to keep secrets, and covering up the possible discovery of those secrets with lies, is absolutely unbelievable to me. To me, in most of these cases, it’s one or more persons wanting to maintain control of a situation or the people that they govern. It may be that they fear (oops…there’s that word again) by revealing the truth they will lose their persona of power and leadership. In reality, with fear most likely being the motivator of keeping these secrets, those keeping the secrets are cowards. They don’t trust the rest of us to react favorably to the information being hidden from us.

Another truth about secrets is that they don’t usually remain secrets for long. One way or another, that which is hidden is revealed. The secret-keepers can keep covering up the truth with layer after layer of misinformation and misdirection, but after a while it becomes almost impossible to deny what the truth of the matter really is. There are some things that the government here has tried to keep secret for so long, and so much information has leaked out and been confirmed, that it now has become a joke with them still thinking they have kept their secret.

I have often wished that, for just one day, none of us could keep secrets or lie. Can you imagine what we find out about ourselves and others? Does the thought of that possibility terrify you or do you find the possibility refreshing? I have found myself feeling both. On one hand, there is so much that I know is hidden from us that it would be refreshing to hear the truth. On the other hand, I do have some secrets of my own and I do hold the fear of rejection and disapproval concerning a few of them. Still, it would be so wonderful for all us to no longer feel fear and just speak our truth and not hold back. It would be so wonderful to hear those who govern us speak with honesty and integrity, holding back nothing.

How about this – each of us keep only those secrets that bring joy upon their revelation and speak with honesty and integrity about everything else? You know our energies ripple out. If we could bring ourselves to do this on a regular basis, those energies will ripple out. Perhaps in time, others will feel their effects and all those other secrets will be revealed with honesty and integrity. I have hope and that’s no secret.

Honesty

Love & Blessed Be